Television

You may have heard that Tiger Woods is making his first publicized appearance tomorrow where he will read off a list of reasons why he is a better person that was most likely written by a publicist and lawyer while they were killing puppies.  I wonder how said lawyer and publicist feel about the new pilot that was just ordered by Spike TV that features a sex-addicted golf caddy named Tiger.  Probably not too pumped.

The single-camera "Back Nine" stars "The Dukes of Hazzard" alum John Schneider as Ronnie Barnes, a hard-drinking, larger-than-life, washed-up former U.S. Open champion. He travels the country competing in small-time tournaments with Tiger, his sex-addicted longtime caddy, in order to qualify again for the PGA Tour.

Miguel Nunez is in negotiations to play Tiger in the project written by Jason Filardi ("17 Again") and Mark Perez ("Accepted").

Spike put the "Back Nine" script on the fast track almost a year ago. The sex-addict Tiger-named character was part of that early script and preceded by more than a year Woods' November car crash that opened the floodgates to allegations about his extramarital affairs. Woods is expected to publicly address those allegations for the first time Friday.   [via the hollywood reporter]

The bummer about all this is that if it weren't for all the sexy time with the ladies we'd probably be comparing this to John Daly, which would be awesome.  I'm going to guess this project was put on the fast track when Spike realized just how awesome Eastbound and Down was.  The washed-up athlete is so hot right now.  Either way seems like something to possibly get excited about, we'll keep you updated.

While it may not be a Sharktopus, a Dinoshark still sounds pretty badass.  Luckily the legendary Roger Corman made a movie about it for us.

"Global warming causes the glaciers to break apart," Corman explains. "We start the picture with real beautiful shots of the glaciers falling into the ocean. The unborn egg of the Dinoshark that has been frozen for millions of years is released."

"Dinoshark," which debuts March 13, is a follow-up of sorts to Corman's "Dinocroc." Corman originally thought to do "Dinocroc 2," but Syfy executives discovered that, unlike theatrical audiences, TV movie audiences respond better to new-but-similar ideas more than direct sequels.  [via the live feed]

Wow, that is just great.  The entire read is pretty special as it kind of gets into the creative process behind these Syfy gems.  Strangely it sounds a lot like they just combine weird animals, justify the new mashup creature's existence, and then just try and pretend it's real.  Even stranger is that this is the exact same technique I use with my girlfriend.

It's nice to get news about a new Larry Charles project that doesn't include McG, and here we have it.  Unfortunately it is about a British guy, and you know what they say Lloyd, the French are assholes.

CBS has handed a presentation order to an untitled comedy from "Borat" and "Bruno's" Larry Charles and Ant Hines.

The semi-scripted project, from Sony TV and Tantamount, stars English actor Paul Kaye as a British low-life moving to LA to reconnect with his daughter who is a teen celebrity.

"Da Ali G Show" alum Hines penned the project, with Charles on board to direct.  [via the hollywood reporter]

Not my favorite premise but I can see some room for comedy there.  Unfortunately I know nothing about Paul Kaye but per the always informative and often somewhat accurate Wikipedia.

Paul Kaye (born 1965) is an English comedian and actor. He achieved notoriety in 1995 portraying the character of Dennis Pennis, a shock interviewer on The Sunday Show. Recently he has been known as rude New Jersey lawyer Mike Strutter with his own show Strutter on MTV.

Hopefully this works, we'll fill you in on some more details as they become available.