I am assuming you have heard about NBC's insanely moronic and short-sighted plan to move Jay Leno back to his 11:35 time slot and to request that Conan O'Brien and Jimmy Fallon move their respective shows back a half hour. To be fair they did make one good decision along with this, and that was to cancel The Jay Leno Show, but somehow he still has one at 11:35. I would have posted more info on this but I was too busy protesting outside the NBC offices, I'm hardcore like that.*
I don't want to talk too much about this because then my head starts to hurt and I see dead people, so I'm not. As if the slap to Conan's face that was The Jay Leno Show wasn't bad enough, NBC's latest move is borderline sodomy. Conan hasn't been private about his feelings on his last few shows, as these clips can attest to, now he has officially responded and says all the right things in the right way. Love it, I'll post the whole thing.
People of Earth:
In the last few days, I’ve been getting a lot of sympathy calls, and I want to start by making it clear that no one should waste a second feeling sorry for me. For 17 years, I’ve been getting paid to do what I love most and, in a world with real problems, I’ve been absurdly lucky. That said, I’ve been suddenly put in a very public predicament and my bosses are demanding an immediate decision.
Six years ago, I signed a contract with NBC to take over The Tonight Show in June of 2009. Like a lot of us, I grew up watching Johnny Carson every night and the chance to one day sit in that chair has meant everything to me. I worked long and hard to get that opportunity, passed up far more lucrative offers, and since 2004 I have spent literally hundreds of hours thinking of ways to extend the franchise long into the future. It was my mistaken belief that, like my predecessor, I would have the benefit of some time and, just as important, some degree of ratings support from the prime-time schedule. Building a lasting audience at 11:30 is impossible without both.
But sadly, we were never given that chance. After only seven months, with my Tonight Show in its infancy, NBC has decided to react to their terrible difficulties in prime-time by making a change in their long-established late night schedule.
Last Thursday, NBC executives told me they intended to move the Tonight Show to 12:05 to accommodate the Jay Leno Show at 11:35. For 60 years the Tonight Show has aired immediately following the late local news. I sincerely believe that delaying the Tonight Show into the next day to accommodate another comedy program will seriously damage what I consider to be the greatest franchise in the history of broadcasting. The Tonight Show at 12:05 simply isn’t the Tonight Show. Also, if I accept this move I will be knocking the Late Night show, which I inherited from David Letterman and passed on to Jimmy Fallon, out of its long-held time slot. That would hurt the other NBC franchise that I love, and it would be unfair to Jimmy.
So it has come to this: I cannot express in words how much I enjoy hosting this program and what an enormous personal disappointment it is for me to consider losing it. My staff and I have worked unbelievably hard and we are very proud of our contribution to the legacy of The Tonight Show. But I cannot participate in what I honestly believe is its destruction. Some people will make the argument that with DVRs and the Internet a time slot doesn’t matter. But with the Tonight Show, I believe nothing could matter more.
There has been speculation about my going to another network but, to set the record straight, I currently have no other offer and honestly have no idea what happens next. My hope is that NBC and I can resolve this quickly so that my staff, crew, and I can do a show we can be proud of, for a company that values our work.
Have a great day and, for the record, I am truly sorry about my hair; it’s always been that way.
Yours,
Conan
I propose he just have a new show, which will clearly end up somewhere besides NBC if they stick to their plan, entitled Conan vs NBC and he could just make fun of them all the time. At the very least it should be a mandatory nightly segment. [via]
* - It should be noted that I'm not really hardcore like that, and this sentence may have been modified to fit the post as opposed to reality, which consequently is relative anyway so who even knows if that's true.
